Batman Vs his greatest enemies
by ChaosRuler
Summary: Batman faces off against his greatest enemies! The bird and the lizard is up!
1. No laughing matter

Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.

Batman had just finished rounding up the last of the gang he had just stopped. Commisioner Gordon was there as well. "Batman I don't know what we would do without you!" He said. "Neither do I Jim." Batman said under his breath. "What?" Gordon asked. "Nothing. It seems the Joker has escaped from Arkham again huh?" Batman asked taking a playing card out of his utility belt and showing it off. "Yes. His girlfriend Harley Quinn also escaped." Gordon answered and turned his back for a second. "Do you have any idea of where they could be hiding?" Gordon asked and turned back to see Batman was gone.

Joker was preparing something under a sheet. "What are you doing puddin'?" Harley asked. "I'm making something! What does it look like!" Joker screamed. "Can I help?" Harley asked. "NO!" Joker yelled. "You know what would be cool? If you painted mean eyes on it!" Harley suggested. "Too Two-Face, NO!" Joker replied. "How about a giant skunk that shoots missiles and needle hairs?" Harley suggested. Joker came out from under the sheet and grabbed Harley by the neck. "NO! Do you not not know what no means!" Joker screamed in her face. "Yes I know what no means Mr. J!" Harley said trying to back away. "Oh okay then!" Joker said and his mood brightened. Harley sighed. "GET OUT OF HERE YOU BUBBLE HEADED IDIOT!" Joker yelled and knocked her out the window. Harley screamed but then remembered she had a balloon in her pocket. She took it out and blew into it and it made a giant Whoopie Cushion. "AHHHHHHHHH!" Harley screamed and put the Whoopie cushion under her. The fall was incredible. Except for Harley not going splat like the Joker had intended. "AND DON'T COME BACK!" Joker screamed shaking his fist out the window he had thrown her out of.

"Pushed around by a psycho clown huh?" Batman said. "AHH! BATMAN! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM!" Harley screamed and took out a capgun. "Put that down before you hurt yourself." Batman said and threw a Batorang at her hand. "OW!" She yelled and the capgun went flying. "Where's the Joker!" Batman asked and slammed her against the wall. "He's...he's on the top floor!" Harley screamed. Batman dropped Harley and walked away. Harley took out a mallet and whacked Batman before he could stop her. When Batman woke up he was in the repair shop at the top floor with the Joker and Harley. "So Batman! I'm glad you could make it! But it seems you are a bit tied up right now! Ha ha ha ha!" Joker cackled evilly. "What are you doing Joker!" Batman questioned. "I'm going to take this little laser and blow a hole in Gotham City!" Joker yelled and laughed evilly. Harley threw the sheet off the Joker's machine and it was a laser gun.

Batman's eyes narrowed. "But you won't be around long enough to witness this Batsy!" Joker said and two big strong guys wearing black jackets and clown masks walked up to Batman with pistols. "Tell me those are Bang-guns." Batman said blankly. "NOPE! THEY ARE THE REAL DEAL BATMAN! YOU ARE GOING TO DIE!" Joker replied and laughed evilly. Batman was secretly undoing the ropes around his wrists with a Batarang. "Okay boys get ready to kill the Bat!" Harley said and leaned against the laser gun. "HARLEY NO!" Joker screamed and Harley sat on the self destruct button. "You fool!" Batman yelled and dived in to save her before the laser gun blew her up. "KILL BATMAN!" Joker ordered and ran into the fire door. The 2 henchmen began to shoot into the thick smoke. Batman put his hand over Harley's mouth and made her walk out in front of him. "If you shoot me Quinn gets shot!" Batman said. The 2 henchmen looked at each other and smiled. They shot anyways and Batman pushed Harley to the side and tackled one of them. He knocked him out then threw a knock out gas pellet at the other one.

Batman followed Joker out the fire door and into the fire escape. Joker was already at the bottom and Batman leaped down the whole thing and landed on his feet. Joker ran to his red convertable and got inside. He fixed his fuzzy dice on the mirror and then saw Batman running at his car. "OOPS! GOTTA RUN BATSY!" Joker said and drove right through the garage door. Batman got on a motorcycle and followed him. "Good thing I got away from gruesome!" Joker said and began to whistle his theme song. Batman pulled up beside Joker and punched him in the jaw and boarded his car. "OUCH! WHAT WAS THAT FOR!" Joker said weakly and rubbed his jaw. "It's over Joker. I'm taking you in" Batman said. "R-ight!" Joker said and punched Batman in the stomach then in the side of the face. Joker took out his joybuzzer and pushed Batman against the edge of the car. He began to shock Batman and laugh madly. Batman was screaming as the Joker shocked him. "This is my...stop!" Batman said and kicked Joker to the side and used his Batgrapple to escape the car. "Hmph! Where is he off to in such a hurry!" Joker yelled then saw he was heading toward a cliff. "AHAHAHAHHA!" He laughed and then screamed as the car fell over.

Batman returned back to the Batcave to see Robin waiting there for him. "Back from your date I see?" Batman asked. "Yes. What happened to the Joker" Robin asked. "I don't think I've seen the last of his act". Batman said and the credits started.


	2. Green with envy

Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.

Poison Ivy was sneaking her way into Gotham City's biggest Green House. She was planning to steal a special toxin that would make all her plants grow to a monstrous size. Poison Ivy saw what she needed to steal inside a glass display case. "This is exactly what I need!" Ivy said. The cameras around the room caught her stealing the toxin. The security guards wasted no time in getting down there to stop her. "PAMELA ISLEY! YOU ARE UNDER ARREST!" One of the guards yelled recognizing her former identity. "I would love to stay and play boys but I have some plants to feed. You're welcome to call Batman if you want to though!" Ivy said and shot blow darts into their necks. "Too easy." She said and escaped.

The Mayor had heard about the break in and arranged a meet with Gordon and Harvey Bullock. They were talking about beafing up security. "MAYOR HILL! WE SHOULD GET RID OF THIS BATMAN! WHERE WAS HE WHEN WE NEEDED HIM!" Bullock yelled. "I'm sure there was a reason why Batman wasn't there." Mayor Hill said. Jordan was secretly listening in outside the room. "How do you think we'll be able to stop Poison Ivy now that she stole those toxins?" Gordon asked. "I don't know. We might have to call in the army if this gets bad enough" The Mayor said. Jordan went to his room and tied his blanket around his neck and took his magician wand. "I'll stop Poison Ivy for Batman! He did save me from the Joker." Jordan said and left the Mayor's house.

Jordan was walking into the field behind Poison Ivy's house. "This must be the place". He whispered to himself. A vine wrapped around his ankle and pulled his leg into the ground. "AHHH!" Jordan screamed. Poison Ivy ran out of her house with a cross-bow. "WHO'S IS IT!" She yelled and looked to see that Jordan was trying to whack the vine off his ankle. "Well if it isn't Mayor Hill's son...what's your name again?" She asked. "It's Jordan! Now can you sick your crazy plant off of me!" He yelled. "Sorry can't do that." Ivy said smiling. "Why...why not!" Jordan yelled and tried to stomp the vine. "Because now I have a hostage to get Batman right into my trap!" Ivy said evilly. The vine lifted Jordan into a cage made of thick tree stumps. "You can try and get out of there but you won't be able to." Ivy said and turned around. A couple of her henchwomen were standing there with their poison gas throwers. They were all dressed in cyan body suits and they all had blond hair.

"I want you to be all watching this place. Now that Jordan is missing Batman might think to come here." Ivy said and walked back to her house. Batman was watching from a tree far away with his binoculars. "What do you see Batman?" Robin asked. "Ivy has Jordan!" Batman said. "No way! The Mayor's son?" Robin asked. "Yes. I'm glad I brought you too. Last night Ivy stole some growth toxins. Plus she isn't alone." Batman said. Batman and Robin snuck over to the cage Jordan was in. "Batman!" Jordan whispered. "Relax Jordan I'm getting you out of here!" Batman said and started to unlock the cage. "OH NO YOU'RE NOT!" The henchwomen yelled and sprayed her poison gas at Batman. Batman unlocked the cage and jumped away with Jordan right before the poison gas touched them. Robin threw a Batorang and disarmed her. "I got it Batman! You get Jordan out of here!" Robin yelled.

Poison Ivy ran out of her house again and started shooting arrows at Robin. "You're not going anywhere Bird brain!" She yelled and shot Robin in the arm. Robin fell to the ground several of Poison Ivy's henchwomen ran over to him. "Put him in the cage! There's no way Batman would leave Robin here!" She said evilly. Batman told Jordan to go home when they were far enough away from Poison Ivy's. Batman tried to call Robin on his communicator but Robin didn't pick up. Batman ran back to Ivy's house and saw Robin was trying to break free from his prison. Two of Poison Ivy's guards were standing by his cage. Batman tied a Batorang to a thick rope and threw it around there ankles. "WHOAAA!" They both yelled and Batman tightened the rope and they tripped over each other. "Batman!" Robin yelled and Batman freed him. "Where's Ivy!" Batman asked. "Right here Batman!" She yelled from the top of her house. "Now I'm going to put you and your Junior under the ground!" She yelled and threw the toxin into an already huge plant. It grew 2 times it's normal size, making it close to 16 feet tall.

"Look at that thing!" Robin yelled. "We can take it! You go after Ivy." Batman ordered and tackled the plant monster. Robin used his batgrapple to reached the roof of Ivy's house. "Not this time red!" Robin said and took out his bo-staff. "Aww is bird boy hurt?" Ivy asked pretending to care. "You're going to Arkham for a very long time!" Robin said. Poison Ivy took out her cross-bow and tried to shoot Robin again. "Why don't you learn some new tricks!" Robin yelled and charged at her with his bo-staff out in front of him. "I have!" Ivy said and threw pink dust into Robin's face. "AHHH!" Robin yelled and put his gloves to his eyes. "That should make you dizzy." Ivy said and pushed Robin over the roof. Ivy looked down at Robin and he was on the ground. She smiled evilly and jumped down next to him. "Time for you to get the point Robin!" She yelled and revealed her spiked high heel. She raised her foot above his chest but Batman punched her in the face out of nowhere.

Ivy flew a few feet and landed in a small pond. "HOLD ON WE'RE COMING!" Ivy's henchwomen yelled and charged over at Batman with blow darts in hand. "Do they ever give up?" Robin asked still lying in the ground. Robin threw a Batorang and it missed them and cut the rope off a cage above them. "YOUR AIM IS AWFUL BATMAN!" One yelled and prepared to shoot but the cage slammed down on them. The plant monster whacked Batman in the face and he went flying through one of Ivy's windows.

The plant monster looked at Robin and Robin tried to aim at it and was successful. The weed killer needle went right into the creatures center and it exploded into millions of pieces with yellow goo flying everywhere. "AHH! MY BABY!" Ivy yelled and crawled out of the water. Robin threw another roped Batorang around her ankles and it tripped her. "Going somewhere?" Batman said and was standing right behind her. "DARN!" Ivy said and pounded her fist into yellow goo.

The next day Alfred served the his vegetable surprise. He took it out of the oven and starred in shock. "GOOD HEAVENS!" He yelled and Bruce and Dick went over to see. "Ewww" They both said at once and saw the plant monsters yellow goo all over the vegetables.

The credits are shown.


	3. The biggest dummy

Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.

Arnold Wesker and his two thugs were driving away in there limo. "Boss we gotta ditch the police!" Rhino yelled. "WELL GET MOVING DUMMY!" Scarface yelled. "Yes Mr. Scarface!" Rhino said nervously. The police pulled out in front of their car. "We're trapped!" Wesker said nervously. "WELL WE'LL FIGHT THEM HERE THEN!" Scarface yelled and shot his tommy gun through the back of the car. The police ducked into cover and Scarface laughed evilly. "You dummies better shoot the other cops while me and the toadie take these ones!" Scarface ordered

Mugsy and Rhino aimed at their pistols at the cops that were trying to rush their car. "Ummm...Mr. Scarface..." Wesker said timidly. "Can't you see I'm busy here!" Scarface yelled and kept shooting at the police. "Sir, it's Batman!" Wesker yelled. "Wesker you seriously need to get help!" Batman said and grabbed him by the shirt collar. "DON'T LET HIM TREAT YOU LIKE THAT DUMMY!" Scarface screamed and smack Batman with his wooden hand. Wesker laughed timidly. Rhino punched Batman in the face and he went flying into a brick wall. "I got him, Mr. Scarface!" Rhino stated. "YES YOU GOT HIM! I SAW YOU!" Scarface screamed. "Yes sir, Mr. Scarface, sorry Mr. Scarface. You're the boss!" Rhino said in fear. "AND DON'T YOU FORGET IT!" Scarface screamed. They all jumped back into the car and they sped of down a street.

Gordon ran up to where Batman had hit the brick wall and Batman was gone. "He always manages to do that!" Gordon said to Bullock. Batman was back at the Batcave with Robin and Batgirl. "How did they get away?" Robin asked. "Rhino hit me...hard." Batman said and rubbed his chin. "What should we do now?" Robin asked. "We wait until they strike again." Batman answered. The next day Bruce was driving to Wayne Enterprises. "Have a good visit Master Bruce." Alfred said and dropped him off. Bruce went to the top floor of the building and went to see what his engineers were making now. "Good afternoon Mr. Wayne!" One of the workers said and walked by. "You too!" Bruce said back and kept walking. A door flew open and Rhino came in with the rest of his gang right behind him. "OKAY PEOPLE! NOBODY LEAVES! DON'T TRY TO PLAY HERO AND YOU WON'T GET HURT!" Scarface yelled. Everyone gasped. Bruce snuck away and into a closet. He was about to call Batgirl and Robin but Mugsy opened the door and dragged him out by the arm.

"What have we here?" Scarface asked. "I caught this one trying to escape!" Mugsy answered. "Isn't he Bruce Wayne?" Rhino asked. "Yes! Yes he is. We will get big ransom for him!" Scarface said evilly. "What should we do with him?" Mugsy asked. "Tie him up with the others." Scarface ordered. "Yes, Mr. Scarface!" Mugsy said and pushed Bruce into a chair and tied him to it. Bruce knew he couldn't use his fighting skills without his Batman costume on. Gordan and the rest of the police force were outside the building. "You guys get in there and stop them!" Bullock shouted at the SWAT officers. "Oh no! The police are here!" Wesker said in a cowardly voice. "Don't worry about them dummy! We have Bruce Wayne!" Scarface reminded. Mugsy put a pistol to Bruce's head. The SWAT officers kicked the door in and raised their assault rifles. "Don't try anything stupid! We will kill Bruce Wayne!" Scarface threatened. "Mr. Scarface...maybe we should just leave and not hurt anybody..."Wesker said timidly. "NO WAY DUMMY!" Scarface yelled back. The SWAT officers were confused and kept watching them argue.

While Rhino and Mugsy were looking the other way Bruce freed himself and ran. "HEY! SHOOT HIM DUMMIES!" Scarface yelled. Rhino and Mugsy tried to shoot Bruce but they missed. The SWAT officer started to shoot back but then Mugsy threw a sleeping gas grenade at them. "Now get Wayne!" Scarface ordered. Bruce had successfully called Batgirl and Robin and was now in costume. Scarface and his gang ran up to the roof and saw Batman standing there. "YOU!" Scarface yelled and began to shoot his machine gun at Batman. Batman disarmed him with a batorang and tackled Rhino. Rhino punched Batman in the jaw. "UGH!" Batman yelled an flew back into a railing. "Rhino took out a knife and ran at Batman. "AHHHH!" He yelled and tried to stab Batman in the chest. Batman kicked him in the chest and got him off. Rhino grunted as he fell into a stack of steel barrels. Mugsy aimed his pistol at Batman and Scarface had grabbed his machine gun again. Robin and Batgirl threw Batorangs and knocked their guns away. "HEY!" Scarface yelled.

"Sorry about that!" Robin yelled and hit Mugsy in the face with his bo-staff. Gordan and Bullock kicked the door open. "We can take it from here Batman!" Gordan said and police officers cuffed Mugsy. "GET US OUT OF HERE DUMMY!" Scarface ordered. "How?" Wesker asked nervously. "JUMP!" Scarface yelled. Wesker looked over the railing and he got scared at how high he was. "WESKER NO!" Batgirl yelled. Wesker lost his balance and fell over anyway. "He grabbed a ledge with his free arm. Batman ran down to the window and tried to save him. "Grab my hand Wesker!" Batman said. "I can't!" Wesker said and looked at Scarface. "Do it or you'll fall!" Robin said standing behind Batman. "Don't do it dummy!" Scarface yelled. Batman grabbed his other hand and Scarface fell out of it but Batman pulled Wesker to safety. "MR. SCARFACE!!!!!" Wesker screamed and started to cry. "I'm glad nobody is pulling our strings." Robin said jokingly.

The credits start.


	4. A Wonderful land

Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.

Bruce Wayne was at the carnival with Dick Grayson. Bruce looked at all the games and rides. "What's the matter? Remembering your childhood again?" Dick asked. "No. Just I don't really trust these rides." Bruce admitted. "I'll win you a prize to show you how safe everything is!" Dick said and ran over to the bottle game. "How many tries would you like sir?" The man behind the counter said. He was that old carnival type and he was wearing a red and white stripped shirt. "I would like one try!" Dick said in his determined voice. Dick threw the baseball at the metal bottles and every single one of them went flying into the back of the booth. "Whoa son! That's some arm you got there!" The man yelled. "Good job Dick." Bruce said standing next to him. "What prize would you like?" The man asked. A scream was heard from a few booths away. "What's the matter mam? Is Jervis Tetch not the best at mind games that you have ever seen?" The Mad Hatter asked in a raspy voice.

"Dick I think we got trouble!" Bruce said and they ran away. The Mad Hatter ripped the woman's pearl necklace right off from around her neck. "Very nice, very nice indeed!" The Mad Hatter said checking the pearls. "I suggest nobody here try anything funny, because me and my friends will be taking all your money!" The Mad Hatter yelled and people with his mind control tags on their heads walked up behind him. "Not so fast Hatter!" Batman yelled and threw a Batorangs at his hand. "AHH! HOW DARE YOU!" Jervis yelled and his henchmen attacked Batman. "Get ready Robin! There strength is increased by those mind-control devices!" Batman warned.

The first one to attack Robin was a man wearing a motor cycle jacket. "DESTROY BATMAN AND ROBIN!" He yelled. The one that attacked Batman was a woman in a pink dress. "Must do what Mr. Hat says!" She said mindlessly. She whacked Batman with her purse and he went flying. A brick fell out of the purse and landed on the ground with a thud. "Talk about hard headed!" The Mad Hatter said with glee. He snuck around the back of Batman and put a mind-control tag on his cowl. "There we go simple Bat! Now everyone will know where your at!" The Mad Hatter said and laughed. Batman walked over to Robin who was having trouble with both the people with tags on them. Batman grabbed Robin and began to crush his ribs.

"BATMAN STOP! IT'S ME!" Robin yelled in pain. "Batman cannot hear your pleas! He is under my control!" The Mad Hatter said and grabbed a pocket knife. Robin kicked Batman and then threw a Batorang at the Mad Hatter's hand. "OUCH!" Hatter yelled in pain. "Must destroy! Mr. Hat says to." The henchmen said. "I would hate to resort to such a commoners meaning of violence but it seems I that I haven't a choice!" The Mad Hatter said and pulled out a tommy-gun and aimed it at Robin. "Batman is my puppet now!" Hatter yelled. Batman threw a gas bomb at Robin and he was blinded and started to cough. "Get him Batman! I want Gotham City to see how fake their heroes are!" Hatter commanded. Batman grabbed Robin and put a tag behind his ear.

"Destroy Comissioner Gordon! I commandeth thy!" Hatter ordered. Batman and Robin got into someone's car and drove to the police department. "Bullock! The Mad Hatter has attacked the people at the carnival! We need all officers down there now!" Gordon ordered. Batman and Robin appeared behind him. "Batman? How did you know there was trouble? I didn't even turn on the Bat-signal yet!" Gordon asked. Batman picked up Gordon by the neck. "Must kill Gordon for Mr. Hat!" Batman said in a mindless voice. "The Mad Hatter has him under his control!" Gordon yelled. "DROP HIM BATS!" Bullock ordered and pointed a pistol at Batman. The police all took out pistols and aimed them at Batman and Robin. Gordon grabbed a knightstick and knocked Batman over the head with it. Batman grunted and fell back. "Jim? What happened?" Batman asked rubbing his head. Robin punched Gordon into a desk. "Destroy Gordon!" Robin said dryly. "ROBIN NO!" Batman yelled and took off the tag from behind his ear.

"Hatter did this didn't he?" Bullock asked. "Yes. He's at the carnival!" Batman explained. "Alright I'm getting my officers down there now!" Gordon said and picked up the phone. Batman and Robin called the Batmobile to come pick them up and bring them back to the carnival. They arrived at the carnival and it was night time now. The Mad Hatter was standing on a stage. "ATTENTION! We must strike Gotham City when they least expect it!" Hatter yelled to a whole carnival of hypnotized people. Batman threw a Batorang at his hat. "What happened to your plan to attack Gordon?" Robin asked. "I HAVE A NEW PLAN NOW!" Hatter yelled and grabbed his hat back. "GET THEM!" Hatter ordered and all the people chased Batman and Robin. "You distract them and I'll get Hatter!" Batman said and snuck away from Robin.

"Yes soon my plan will be complete! And with Gotham City in flames on it's ruins I will build me a new Wonderland!" Hatter said with glee. "You need help Tetch!" Batman said. "Most certainly indeed...help with my Bat infestation problem!" Mad Hatter said and snapped his fingers. 2 thugs walked up to Batman with tommy-guns. Batman tackled one and knocked him out. "KILL HIM!" Hatter yelled. The other thug turned to Batman but got punched in the jaw before he could shoot. "Now Batman! Can't we talk this over!" Hatter said backing away and sweating. "No!" Batman said and grabbed his hat and crushed it. The mind-control chips shattered to pieces on all the people and they wondered what had happened. "Thanks again Batman." Gordon said and cuffed Jervis Tetch. Bullock made Tetch stand up and walked him into a police car. When Gordon looked back Batman was gone.

The credits roll.


	5. Rail Roaded

Disclaimer: I do not own Batman.

Batman was hot on the trail of Rupert Thorne's men. They had just robbed an old homeless man of the old money he had. "Mr. Thorne will be happy to see all the rich people we robbed tonight!" One of them said and opened a sack of money. "Mr. Thorne wants us to keep robbing wealthy people!" The one driving the car explained. "Look out! It's Batman!" One thug yelled and pointed up at the Batwing in fear. "QUICK CONOR DRIVE!" The one in the back seat yelled and put all the money back into the sack. The car sped up to full speed and the Batwing continued to chase them. The Batwing dropped down next to the car and picked the car up with it's razor sharp pincers. "AHH LET US DOWN!" They yelled. "ATTENTION SCUM! TELL ME WHERE THORNE IS!!!" Batman shouted through his radio. The Batwing picked the car up and flew high into the sky. "We can't tell you that!" One of the henchmen said weakly. "LAST CHANCE!" Batman yelled and flew the Batwing upside down. "WHOOOOOOOA!" The men cried in fear and looked out the car windows. "OKAY OKAY! WE'LL TELL YOU! HE'S HIDING IN THE OLD SUBWAY!" The crooks screamed in fear. "That's more like it. There might be some hope for you guys yet!" Batman yelled and dropped them right in front of StoneGate prison.

Batman headed toward the old subway. "We got guests Mr. Thorne!" One thug yelled and ran into Thorne's private quarters. "WHAT! WHO!" Thorne yelled in surprise. "IT'S BATMAN!" The thug yelled. "I'll teach that flying rodent not to interefere with me anymore!" Thorne said and took out a rocket launcher. "WHERE IS HE!" Thorne screamed. "He's flying in with his Batwing!" The crook explained. Thorne tossed one of his men the rocket launcher. "SHOOT HIM DOWN!" Thorne ordered and sat in his leather chair behind his desk. The thugs ran out to the train tracks and shot a rocket out at the Batwing. Batman tried to dodge but got caught in the blast. "We got him! We better go tell Mr. Thorne! He'll reward us well for that!" The thug said happily. The Batwing was doing spins and it was nose diving back to Earth. Batman jumped out of the cockpit and used his Batgrapple to escape the explosion.

Back at Rupert Thorne's office Thorne was talking to his henchmen. Roland Daggett walked out from behind a door. "Are you sure you'll be able to get my company back up and running?" Daggett asked. "Yes. Remember we're splitting whatever my boys steal 50-50!" Thorne reminded. "Rupert Thorne and Roland Dagget...two of my favorite people!" Batman said leaning against the door frame. "GET HIM!" Thorne yelled and Daggett and Thorne's men attacked Batman. "I THOUGHT YOU KILLED HIM JOHNNY!" Thorne yelled. "I thought I did too boss! Don't worry this time I won't fail!" He yelled and jumped Batman.

Batman punched them away from him and they went flying against the wall. "Just think of it guys. You're finally going to get the justice you deserve!" Batman said walking closer to Thorne and Daggett. "Oh no you don't Batman!" Thorne said dramatically and pulled out a gun. Batman knocked the gun out of his hand and grabbed Thorne by the shirt. "YOU'RE NEXT DAGGETT! DON'T GO ANYWHERE!" Batman threatened in his deep voice. "What are you up to this time Thorne!" Batman screamed in his face. "Gee being the clever detective you are I thought you would guess that yourself." Thorne said calmly. "Huh? Why are you smiling?" Batman asked and got knocked in the back of the head with a board. Daggett and Thorne smiled and Thorne's men brought Batman away.

Batman woke up to find himself tied to the subway tracks. "You know this subway is abandon Batman, but tonight Mayor Hill is reopening it!" Daggett said evilly. "No..." Batman said in his surprised voice. "Oh yes my friend! I'll be here personally to over-see your death." Thorne said and smacked Batman across the face. Batman was secretly cutting the ropes with a knife. "There is no hope for you this time Dark Knight!" Thorne said. "At eleven O'clock the train will be here to turn you into a pancake. Oh and guess what...it's 10:58!" Daggett said and laughed evilly. Batman freed himself and punched Daggett in the side of the face. Thugs started to shoot at Batman. Batman jumped away and hid. "FIND HIM AND KILL HIM!" Thorne ordered. A thug was searching around a broken train with his tommy-gun ready. Batman came up behind him and tapped him on the shoulder. "Huh?" The thug asked and got punched in the face. "HE'S OVER HERE!" Thorne screamed and the thugs started to all shoot at Batman. "NO YOU MANIACS THIS TRAIN IS EXPLOSIVE!" Batman yelled and the train exploded. The train Daggett and Thorne had mentioned earlier was coming now and it was headed right for the explosion. Batman got to the track reversal level and pulled it before the train could go into the explosion.

A thug was aiming at Batman but a Batorang was thrown at his hand. The gun flew away and Batman tackled him. "Let's go Thorne!" Daggett said and they started to run the other way. Batman took out two roped Batorangs and tossed them around Thorne and Daggett's legs. "NO!" Thorne yelled and banged his fists against the ground. Gordon and several police officers rushed into the room. "FREEZE!" Gordon yelled and the police aimed their guns at the thugs. "Hey Comish it's Roland Daggett and Thorne!" Bullock said and pointed at them trying to inch their way away from the police. "This isn't what it looks like officer! We just tried to stop these horrible men from blowing up the train tracks and then Batman jumped us!" Daggett lied. "That's not true boss! You told us to blow up the tracks!" One of the thugs stupidly admitted. Gordon and Bullock went over and cuffed Thorne and Daggett. "You two are going away for a very long time!" Bullock said.

The credits roll.


	6. Don't run out of time

Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.

Batman was trailing Catwoman through the city again. She leaped a building and he followed. "You'll never catch me Batman! But if you asked nicely maybe I might let you!" Catwoman said and giggled. Catwoman hit a lever with her whip and a chemical spilled all over Batman. He grunted and continued to chase his feline loving enemy. Batman ran to the edge of the roof and Catwoman was gone. "Where did she go now?" Batman asked himself. He drove back to the Batcave and saw that Alfred was dusting. Batman sat at the computer and punched in some numbers. Alfred stopped dusting one spot and then moved on to spray the computer screen with windex. "Alfred no!" Batman yelled. "Oh I'm sorry Master Bruce!" Alfred said and paused. "Alfred?" Batman asked. He waved his glove in front of Alfred's face. Suddenly Alfred started to walk backwards and go back to the spot where he was dusting before, then he went backwards up the stairs into the house. "What the-" Batman said and saw his computer was off again. The computer turned back on and Summer Gleason was on the news. "There is trouble in downtown Gotham City! The Clock King has struck again! And he's kidnapped Mayor Hill and Comissioner Gordon!" Summer said into her microphone. Batman ran over to the Bat mobile and drove out of the cave.

One thing was bothering him though, if Clock King was making time go in reverse why didn't it have any effect on him? He sped up and went to the old clock tower that had been rebuilt. Batman ran in the door and climbed up the stairs. "Not even Batman can stop me this time!" Clock King said and looked at Gordon, Hill and Catwoman who were tied to gears. "GIVE IT UP CLOCK KING!" Batman yelled and kicked him. "BATMAN!" Clock King yelled and tried to stab him with his golden minute hand cane. "You'll have to do better then that!" Batman said and dodged. "I can do better!" Clock King said and tried to slice Batman. Batman backed up into a railing and the cane was coming fast, he grabbed it and tried to push it back. "Come now that won't help you!" Clock King said and kicked Batman over the railing. He looked over and Batman threw a gas pellet up at him. "AHHH! HOW DARE YOU!" Clock King screamed and started coughing. Batman was cutting the ropes on Mayor Hill but Clock King threw his cane and it almost hit Batman in the head. "You won't get away with this Batman!" Clock King yelled and reversed time. "AHAHA! What!" Clock King yelled in fear and backed away from Batman. "Your trick has no effect on me for some reason!" Batman said and grabbed Clock King by the jacket. "You can't do this to me!" Clock King screamed.

"I think this will stop Gotham from going in reverse!" Batman said and ripped Clock King's golden watch out of his jacket. "NOOO!" Clock King yelled and the watch exploded. Catwoman saved Batman from falling and brough him to a walkway. "Thanks Catwoman...or should I say Ms. Kyle..."Batman said and put hand cuffes on her. "Hey what about us!" Mayor Hill yelled. Clock King was hanging by his cane which was stuck in the wall. "This isn't over yet Batman!" He yelled and started to climb back up. "Time wasn't on your side!" Clock King yelled and took out his golden watch that was actually a detonation button. "NOOO!" Batman yelled and threw a batorang at it. "AHH! NOO!" Clock King yelled. Your little gimmicks won't work here!" Catwoman said and tripped him. Clock King stumbled and fell over the edge. "AHHHHHHHHH!" He screamed. "Did you think these would hold me Batman?" Catwoman said and threw the hand cuffes into his hand, she then leaped away and ran down the stairs. "It's okay. Another time maybe." Gordon said and was still spinning around the gear he was tied to. "Oh Jim! I almost forgot!" Batman said and untied Mayor Hill and Gordon.

Clock King had fallen a few flights and his glasses were cracked. "Ouch! Now I'm really mad!" He said and reached for his cane. He then dashed back up the stairs and threw his cane at Mayor Hill. "LOOK OUT!" Batman yelled and pushed Hill out of the way. The cane hit him in the leg instead and it left a big cut. Gordon took out his gun and aimed it at the Clock King. "Not so fast!" Clock King said and threw a watch around his hand and it tied both hands together. "Fugate I'm sorry okay! It was an accident!" Mayor Hill said and backed away from him. "I don't care! The point still stays! YOU MADE ME LATE!" Clock King said and followed him back slowly. Batman grabbed Clock King and threw him into a wall which knocked him out. Montoya and Bullock rushed up the stairs with their revolvers out. "It's okay! Batman got Clock King!" Gordon said and Batman was gone.

Batman was starring down Catwoman on a building roof top. "Don't make me do this the hard way..."Batman said. "Oh is that supposed to scare me you big bad bat?" Catwoman asked in a seductive voice. They got close and Batman kissed her then cuffed her again. "That trick doesn't get old. Let's see you pick these!" Batman said and made her walk to the police station.

The credits roll


	7. O' clay, Mr J

Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.

Batman was looking at a piece of goo under a microscope. Looking closer one would actually see that it was a part of Clayface that had broken off. "Alfred I need my utitlity belt now!" Batman demanded. "Right away, Master Bruce!" Alfred said and passed it to him. "I need to go to Axis Chemicals. I have word that Matt Hagen AKA Clayface is striking there tonight!" Batman said and ran to the Bat Mobile. When Batman arrived at Axis Chemicals he was already too late. The doors had been knocked down and there were clay foot prints on the ground leading inside. Batman used his Batgrapple to get to the roof and he looked down into the factory. "Lets go you idiots! How am I supposed to bring Gotham to it's knees if I don't even have the right chemicals!" Clayface screamed. Clayface's henchmen were made out of clay as well. Batman was so busy listening in on Clayface's plan he let one of the clay soldiers sneak up on him. "A little late for a walk eh Batman?" He asked and then hit Batman behind the neck with a metal pipe. Batman fell down to the ground and the clay soldier picked him up with a tentacle.

When Batman woke up he found himself chained above a vat of acid. "GOOD YOU'RE AWAKE!" Clayface screamed. "What happened?" Batman asked. "My men caught you listening in on my plan! But you won't be telling anybody anything. You won't even leave this place with your sanity!" Clayface said evilly. "What?" Batman questioned. "That vat is the same one that turned the Joker into what he is! Speaking of the Joker here he is now!" Clayface yelled and Joker walked out of the shadows. "HELLO BATMAN!" He said evilly and laughed in his high pitch voice. Harley Quinn did cartwheels and landed right in front of Batman. "So sad you have to go this way but it has to be done!" Harley said and kissed Batman on both cheeks. Batman was frowning and he couldn't get the chains off with his hands chained together. "I'm glad you woke up Batsy! You've been tied up there since last night!" Joker said and slapped Batman across the face. "What's your game Joker?" Batman asked. "Game what game? All me and Clayface over here are trying to do is turn everyone in Gotham into freaks--I mean people like him!" Joker said in a sad voice and Harley began to play the world's smallest violin.

"Yeah, yeah clown! Lets get this show on the road!" Clayface ordered. "Aww Matt your no fun!" Joker said and put his hand on Clayface's shoulder. Of course it sank into the clay. "Eww!" Harley and Joker said unified and Joker lost his glove inside Clayface. "LOOK YOU JERK IF YOU'RE GOING TO KEEP BRING UP THIS PLAQUE I'LL CUT YOU OUT OF THE PLAN! NOW TOAST BATMAN!" Clayface ordered. "Here, here, for the death of Batman!" Harley said and grabbed a red lever that controlled the chain Batman was tied up in. "I'll miss you Batsy!" Joker said and laughed evilly. Batman started to lower into the vat and his struggling wasn't helping him any. All of a sudden the Batwing burst through the windows and quickly cut the chain Batman was on and it snatched him up. The Batwing flew the other way and began to escape the factory. "GET THEM!" Clayface ordered and his clay soldiers followed after the Batwing. Batman looked inside the Batwing to see Alfred. "Good timing huh Master Bruce?" Alfred asked. Batman smiled and kept hanging on to the Batwing.

When Batman got back to the Batcave he called Comissioner Gordon. "Gordon here!" Gordon answered. "Yes it's me. Clayface and the Joker have stolen a chemical from Axis and they're planning on releasing it into Gotham!" Batman explained. "You have to stop them Batman! There's no time to evacuate a million people!" Gordon said nervously. "I'll get right on it Jim!" Batman said and hung up the phone. "Master Bruce, I thought I would need to call for back-up." Alfred said standing next to Batgirl and Robin. Batman smiled once again.

The clay soldiers had lost the Batwing and now Clayface was thrashing them. "We're sorry boss!" One yelled but was thrown across the room. "THERE IS NO SORRY! IF BATMAN WARNS EVERYONE TO FLEE THE CITY THEY WILL NEVER NEED TO MAKE ME A CURE!" Clayface screamed. "Yeah about that...me and Harley would much rather have ransom money..."Joker said in a timid voice. "WHAT!" Clayface yelled and turned his head toward Joker. "He he!" Joker said and backed up into a wall. "NO CLOWN! I DON'T WANT TO BE A FREAK FOREVER!" Clayface yelled and tossed him and Harley to the side. "OUCH!" Joker yelled and pulled out a popgun. "OH NO! Please don't shoot!" Clayface said sarcastically. "Hahahahah!" Joker said and sprayed laughing gas all over Clayface. "AHHAHAHAHAHA!" Clayface laughed and continued to laugh. "Mind telling me where the chemical is now!" Joker screamed and tried to grab Clayface but his hands sank through. "AHAHAHAHHA! IT'S IN THE AHHAHAH CONTROL HAHAH ROOM AHAHAH!" Clayface screamed and fell over. "Okee dokee!" Joker said and left a bomb next to Clayface. "AHHAHA! HELP! I CAN'T STOP!" Clayface yelled gasping for air.

Batman landed next to Clayface and put a needle into his arm. "That should calm him down." Batman said and Robin saw the bomb. "BATMAN!" Robin yelled in panic. "I SEE IT!" Batman yelled and threw outside the factory where it exploded. "Ahhh old Clayface should be nothing but play doh by now!" Joker said and laughed evilly. "I love play doh!" Harley said excitedly. "The jokes over kid!" Joker said and walked away with the chemical. "Here you hold this!" Joker said and passed Harley the chemical. She excepted it smiling but when Joker took his hands away she fell to the ground with it crushing her hand. "HEY, HEY! BE CAREFUL WITH THAT!" Joker yelled and hummed his theme song. "Sorry Mr. J!" Harley said and heaved it. Batman was standing on a ledge. "BATMAN!" Joker yelled in surprise. "Don't forget us!" Batgirl and Robin chimed in. "Here, lets see some smiles!" Joker screamed and threw razor sharp playing cards at them. They threw batorangs and the cards bounced away. "Harley!" Joker screamed and saw Harley walking toward him as slow as a turtle. "Good lord girl your weak!" Joker screamed and took the chemical from her. "This will be a sticky situation!" Joker yelled and sprayed the chemical out one of his guns.

He tried to hose down the Bat trio but kept missing. "Come on now! Don't you guys wanna be like Matt?" Joker asked and cranked the gun up to full power. "That's enough Joker!" Batgirl said and cut the hose from the chemical barrel to the gun. "I'm all out of putty!" Joker said nervously. "Should we run now puddin'?" Harley asked. "No. Of course we shouldn't run...EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF!" Joker screamed and ran the other way. "Oh no you don't Joker!" Robin said and threw a batbola around his legs. "CURSES! FOILED AGAIN!" Joker shouted. "Or am I?" He said and slipped his pants off. He then dashed off in his white and red heart boxer shorts. "AHHAHAHA! I hope Batman doesn't mind this!" Joker yelled and ran. Batgirl jumped down from a walkway in front of him and punched him in the nose. "OUF!" Joker shouted and fell down backwards. "I'll call Comissioner Gordon to come pick these guys up." Batman said. Robin was dragging Harley in by the sleeve. "HMPH!" She said and put her nose up to Robin.

Clayface sat in his special cell in Arkham Asylum. "Some day I hope they find a cure for me..." Clayface said and melted into a puddle. "KEEP IT DOWN IN THERE!" Joker screamed and banged on the wall. Batman walked down the rows of cells of Arkham Asylum and looked into them. He walked by Poison Ivy, Two-face, Riddler, Arnold Wesker, Harley, Mr. Freeze, ScareCrow, The Mad Hatter, Killer Croc, Penguin, Baby Doll, Fire Fly, Bane, Clock King, Hugo Strange, Lock-up and Joker. "Matt, I have the cure." Batman said quietly. "You...do?" Clayface asked and ran to the glass cell door. "Yes." Batman said and opened the door. "Drink this." Batman told and Clayface drank a potion. It turned him back to normal and the clay fell down to around his feet. "Wow...I don't know what to say...except thanks!" Matt said. "Don't thank me, thank Bruce Wayne!" Batman said and him and Matt left.

The credits roll.


	8. The bird and the lizard

Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.

Out in the middle of the Gotham river bombs started to go off for no apparent reason.It went on like this for 20 minutes before Batman road in inside the Batsub. "What's going on?" Robin asked. "I don't know Robin. There doesn't seem to be a method to this madness!" Batman said and they watched random bombs explode. Just then Robin and Batman heard a loud clang and something had jumped onto the sub. "What was that?" Robin asked. "I don't know let me switch on the cameras."Batman said and switched them on. Killer Croc was sitting on the sub. "CROC!" Batman said in surprise. "That's right Bat! You're going down this time!" Croc yelled and slammed the exits shut, he then attached a time bomb to the sub. "You're goin' out with a bang!" Croc said and swam away as quickly as he could. "What do we do?" Robin asked. "I honestly have no idea." Batman said calmly.Batman drove the sub up the the shore and tried to kick the exit open. He did it and him and Robin escaped. "Where's Croc?" Robin asked. "I think we've been tricked!" Batman said and pointed to Gotham 1st national bank. The Penguin was going into the bank with Croc. "Lets go!" Batman ordered.

"Give us all of your money and nobody gets hurt!" Penguin announced and took out a smg umbrella. The people threw their money at them. "That's more like it!" Croc said and shoved it into a sack. A batorang swung into the sack and cut it. "BATMAN!" Penguin shouted in surprise. "I thought I killed them!" Croc yelled. "Think again!" Robin yelled and kicked Croc in the face. "Hey!" Penguin objected and stabbed Robin with the point of his umbrella. "OUCH!" Robin screamed. Croc bashed him in the back of the head. "HANG ON ROBIN!" Batman yelled and punched Croc in the chest and kicked Penguin. "Now I have you, you fowl little rodent!" Penguin yelled and sliced at Batman with his umbrella. Croc hit Batman in the back as well and Penguin fired a rope around Batman and Robin. "Well that was too easy dark knight and boy blunder!" Penguin said and walked away with 5,000,000 dollars. "Yeah! You guys look like a couple...a couple of idiots!" Croc said and followed Penguin. "Ugggh...Batman what happened?" Robin asked confused. "They got away!" Batman said and cut the ropes with a knife he had hidden in his gloves. "Lets go after them!" Robin said and called the Bat mbile to pick them up. They jumped in and chased after the villains.

"BATMAN IS FOLLOWING US STILL!" Croc screamed after discovering Batman in the side view mirror. "I'll get them!" Penguin yelled and shot his umbrella's smg at the Bat mobile. A grapple hook came out and latched the bumper of the villains' car. "AHH!" Croc and Penguin yelled as the car stopped in it's tracks. "LETS GET OUT OF HERE!" Croc yelled and made a mad dash into an alley. "WAIT FOR ME!" Penguin screamed. Robin threw a batbola around him and his umbrella landed far away. "You take him I'll get Croc!" Batman ordered and grappled onto a roof top. "I think I lost him!" Crock said and jumped into a man hole. Batman jumped down after him and chased him through the sewer. "Give it up Croc!" Batman said and kicked him in the back. Croc went flying face first into the hazel colored sewer water. "You haven't beaten me yet!" Croc yelled and grabbed Batman. He squeezed Batman tightly around the ribs and Batman punched Croc in the face. "OUCH!" Croc yelled and fell backwards. He hit his head on a hard rock and Batman took this time to handcuff him. Batman grabbed Croc and brought him back to the streets above. "We can take it from here, Batman!" Comissioner Gordon said and the cops threw Croc into a police van where Penguin was already waiting tied up.

The credits roll


	9. Double or nothing

Disclaimer: I do not own Batman still.

Batman was surveying Gotham City from a roof top. The city was quiet tonight and he saw nothing wrong. He leaped over to another roof top and looked down into Crime Alley. He started remembering the night his parents were shot by an unknown gun man. Then he remembered what the man that shot his parents looked like. He had black hair and and black eyes. Batman had never gotten any leads of who this man was. Just then he saw a man and a woman and a child walk down crime alley. The child was holding his mom and dad's hands and they were walking happily down the alley. Out of nowhere a mugger jumped out with a gun. The mugger had grey hair and black eyes. The family looked shocked and the mugger pulled out a revolver. Batman's eyes narrowed and he threw a batorang at the muggers gun. "OUCH!" The mugger yelled and the family ran the other way.

Batman jumped down to the ground and his cape fluttered behind him. He grabbed the mugger by the jacket and slammed him against the brick wall behind them. "BATMAN! LET ME GO PLEASE!" The mugger begged. "WHAT'S YOUR NAME!" Batman screamed. "What's it to you?" The mugger asked. "YOUR NAME...NOW!" Batman ordered and growled. Just then a cat stopped at the entrance to the alley and the door of the back seat opened. Two-face stepped out and he had a tommy-gun. "PUT HIM DOWN, BATMAN!" Two-face ordered. Batman dropped the mugger and he ran. Two-face's gang were now aiming their guns at Batman as well. "What do you want Two-face?" Batman asked. "I want you to be full of led Batman!" Two-face said and started to fire at Batman. He rolled out of the way and hid behind a dumpster. "Don't just stand there get him you mugs!" Two-face ordered and his gang went to go search. Batman ran away and the gang started to shoot him. Batman used his grapple gun to pull himself to the roof of a building. "Nevermind lets go!" Two-face ordered and the man that tried to kill that family got in the car with Two-face.

Batman watched them drive off and his eyes narrowed. He had put a tracer on the car before it drove off. He had called the Bat mobile to his location and he got inside it and tracked Two-face's car with the radar. They stopped at an abandon movie theater. Batman parked in back and used his grapple gun to get on the roof. Two-face was talking to the man. "So your name is Joe Chill huh?" Two-face said. "Yes. I have no idea why Batman is so obsessed with me either." Chill said and sat down. Batman was listening to the whole conversation.

He went into the building through an exit on the roof and snuck down stairs to hear them better. "Lets figure out why Batman would want you so badly. We have Professor Hugo Strange here to see if you have met Batman in your past." Two-face explained. Hugo Strange placed a helmet on Chill's head and started talking put him in a trance. Strange fast forwarded until he reached the night where the Wayne's were killed. The image of Chill's memories appeared on a computer screen and Strange stared wide eyed. "It's Bruce Wayne as a kid!" Strange screamed. "Bruce Wayne!!" Two-face shouted and banged his fist down on a table.

Batman was in shock and he just watched in horror as he watched through Chill's eyes the death of Thomas and Martha Wayne. "Strange remember when you tried to make us think Bruce Wayne was Batman and you sold Joker, Penguin and me a tape of Batman's secret identity?!" Two-face said. "Yes of course!" Strange said. "Well I think you were right! Bruce Wayne really is Batman!" Two-face screamed and banged his fist into the table again, this time the table cracked in half. "Take it easy boss!" One of the gang members said. Joe Chill got out of Hugo Strange's device. "That kid is Batman! Oh god he's after me!" Chill said in fear. "Don't worry Chill, anyone who's an enemy of the Bat is a friend of mine. We'll keep you safe, you did kill his family!" Two-face laughed evilly. Batman ran out of the shadows and punched Two-face in the jaw. "HARVEY! I want to help you!" Batman said. "Batman...I don't want your help! I know who you are now! I love the way I am! I'm not Harvey anymore I am Two-face!" Two-face said evilly. "So it seems Batman was listening as we found out his secret identity!" Strange said and sat down. "I'm not Bruce Wayne!" Batman lied.

"You must be! Chill's mind showed us everything!" Strange said playing with his hands. Batman grabbed Strange by the lab coat and banged him against the wall. "Hands off Batman!" Two-face said and bashed Batman in the back of the neck with a board. "AHH!" Batman screamed and fell to the ground in pain. "FINISH HIM!" Two-face ordered and his gang began to kick Batman in the ribs and beat him. "After all these years I found out my greatest enemy was once my friend!" Two-face screamed and kicked Batman in the head. Batman moaned and fell unconscious. Two-face unmasked him and their theory was deffinite. "Lets kill him." Chill said and pointed a revolver at Bruce's head. A batorang flew down from a window on the roof and knocked the revolver away. Batgirl was standing there. "Hmm it's Batgirl! Lets find out who she is too Strange!" Two-face suggested. Chill reached for his revolver and aimed up at Batgirl. Robin tackled him and Chill fell to the ground. Two-face's gang ran back into the room and Batgirl jumped down from the roof and kicked them all.

Batman woke up and reached for his cowl. He put it back on and grabbed Strange by the lab coat again. He gave Strange a good punch in the face that shattered his glasses. "Lets go Chill!" Two-face yelled and they left the theater. Batman, Robin and Batgirl followed them into a construction building. Two-face and Chill took the lift up to the top floor. "We'll hide here. I think we lost them!" Two-face said and looked around. Batman came out from behind and punched him. He grabbed Chill by the jacket until he was face to face with him. Chill began to sweat and shake. "WHY!!" Batman screamed in his serious voice. "I'M SORRY OKAY! THINGS GOT OUT OF CONTROL THAT NIGHT!" Chill said almost crying. "He killed your old man that's too bad!" Two-face said and hit Batman over the head with a sludge hammer. Batman grunted and let go of Chill. "Thanks Two-face!" Chill said. "Remember when I said you're welcome to stay with us? Well the deals off!" Two-face said and pushed Chill over the girder and he fell to the streets below. "Now Batman! None of your pathetic side kicks can save you this time!" Two-face said and raised the hammer again. "No..." Batman said and his batorang slipped out and cut the ropes on the lift. Two-face slid off and grabbed the edge of the lift for dear life. "Bruce please! Help me!" Harvey Dent said and he was talking in his normal voice. Batman grabbed for his hand but he slipped and Batman looked over the lift with wide eyes. "HARVEY!!!!!!!!" Batman screamed.

Batman almost slipped himself but Robin saved him with the Batwing. The next day Bruce woke up in his bed and Barbra, Dick and Alfred were sitting by his bed. "Master Bruce, so glad you have awaken! I will prepare your breakfast." Alfred said and left the room. "Where's Harvey?" Bruce asked. Dick looked down at the floor. "You couldn't save him could you?" Bruce asked in his serious voice. "No. I'm sorry." Dick said sadly. "What about Hugo Strange?" Bruce asked. "A bonk on the head made him forget the whole night." Barbra explained. "Good. So nobody knows my secret and Joe Chill has been brought to justice." Bruce said. The bat signal showed through the clouds of Gotham city. "Suit up!" Batman ordered and the 3 ran out to the Grandfather clock.

The credits roll.


	10. The Jokes on you

Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.

Bruce Wayne was attending a party this evening. The party was being held at Wayne Manor. Bruce was flirting with 3 or 4 girls until he looked out a window to see the batsignal. "Excuse me ladies I have to go now." Bruce said and went into his father's study. "Sir? What about the guests?" Alfred asked. "You think of something Alfred. Gotham needs Batman." Bruce said and went into the Batcave entrance behind the clock. Batman jumped into the Batmobile and raced off through the cave and out a blocked exit in the mountain. He rushed to Gotham city to see what Gordon's latest emergency was.

Gordon looked at his watch and sighed. There was a little bit of breeze tonight and it blew his jacket. "Waiting for me?" Batman said and Gordon noticed he was right there. "Batman! Someone has kidnapped Montoya!" Gordon spat out. "Leave it to me." Batman said and grappled out of there. Batman was looking around the city from a skyscraper. "Any luck yet sir?" Alfred asked from over the radio. "Nothing. I have no idea what's even going on." Batman replied. "HELP!" A woman yelled from a nearby street. "I have to go Alfred." Batman said and went to the woman. 2 thugs that looked like Gilligan and the Skipper were cornering a woman in an alley. "Come on lady. We just want your cash!" Gilligan said. "Get out of here!" Batman said and knocked their heads together. "Batman!" The woman said in surprise. "SKIPPER! WHERE'S BABY DOLL!" Batman said and lifted him up off the ground. "Right here!" The woman yelled and smacked Batman in the back of the head with a mallet. Baby Doll jumped out of her mech and landed next to Batman. "Ughh...Baby Doll?" Batman said. Baby Doll kicked him in the face and he fell unconscious.

Batman woke up in a room full of toys with big stuffed animals everywhere. "Pinch me if I'm dreaming..."Batman said. Baby Doll pinched his arm. "Like it?!" she asked. "No. It's too cute." Batman said in disgust. Baby Doll smacked him across the face. "Your just a big meanie!" She screamed. "What are you going to do about it, runt?" Batman taunted. "GRRRR! I'LL TEACH YOU!" Baby Doll screamed and smacked him across the face repeatedly. He head butted her and she went flying into a table. "BOSS!" Gilligan yelled and him and Skipper ran in the room. "Did you do this bats?" Skipper asked. "Maybe I did." Batman said in a cocky voice. "Why you little..." Gilligan said and punched Batman in the stomach. "Lets kill him!" Skipper said and tossed Gilligan a revolver. Batman tried to free himself from his straight jacket but it was no use. "DO IT!" Baby Doll ordered. Batman freed himself and punched Skipper right in the face. Gilligan tried to run but Batman grabbed him by his black coat and threw him into a pile of huge wooden letter blocks.

"FINE! I'LL KILL YOU MYSELF!" Baby Doll screamed and ran at Batman with a knife. "Batman took the knife from her and broke her wrist. "OWWWW!" She screamed and cried. "You're going back to Arkham Dahl!" Batman said seriously. Skipper walked up behind him and Batman punched him right in the face without even turning around. "Wow this is much harder then that police woman was!" Gilligan said and reached for his gun. "Police woman?!" Batman said and stepped on his hand. "OW!" Gilligan screamed. Skipper was charging at Batman and Batman threw the still crying Baby Doll into him and he fell backwards. "ALRIGHT SCUM, YOU'RE GOING TO TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU KNOW! WHAT POLICE WOMAN!?" Batman said and put his boot over Gilligan's hand. "DON'T TALK!" Baby Doll screamed. "I can't tell you." Gilligan said. Batman stepped on his hand really hard. "Okay! I'll tell!" Gilligan screamed. "YOU BETTER NOT TELL!" Baby Doll screamed. "TALK NOW! UNLESS YOU NEVER WANT TO MOVE YOUR HAND AGAIN!" Batman threatened and raised his boot above his hand.

"WE GAVE HER TO SOME GUY WEARING A PURPLE SUIT!" Gilligan blurted out. "YOU'RE FIRED!" Baby Doll screamed. "JOKER!" Batman yelled. He grabbed their whole gang and brought them back to the police station. Then he got in the Batmobile and started to scout around for the Joker. Batman went to all Joker's usual spots until he saw a purple car outside a trailer. Batman tried to listen. He looked through the window and saw Montoya tied up. Joker was there talking to Rocko and Headshaw. "We got bat problems!" Harley said and was behind Batman. "HARLEY!" Joker yelled and kicked the trailer door open. "We have company puddin'!" Harley said and took out a rubber chicken. She tried to hit Batman with it but he grabbed her by the arm and threw her into trash cans. "That's not very nice Batman! Headshaw, Rocko, kill him!" Joker ordered and watched. Rocko tried to punch Batman in the head but he dodged all 3 blows and punched Rocko in the face. Headshaw tackled Batman and knocked him down. He began to smash Batman's head against the ground.

"Batman! I had no idea that you kissed the ground we walk on! Ha ha ha ha!" Joker laughed. Batman kicked Headshaw off and into Rocko just as he was getting back up. Harley flipped in front of the Joker. "HEY BRATMAN! IF YOU WANT MR. J YOU HAVE TO GO THROUGH ME!" Harley yelled. Batman walked right up to her and shoved her aside. Harley took out her popgun and shot Batman into the trailer. He was stuck in pink chewing gum. "Well this is a sticky mess you've gotten yourself into!" Joker said. "LET MONTOYA GO!" Batman ordered. "Batsy! What fun would that be?" Joker asked. "Yeah...we're dumping her in the river tomorrow morning!" Harley said happily. "Just to make sure you don't stop us we got Batgirl as well!" Joker said and Rocko brought out Batgirl who was tied up. "Well it looks like we'll have to kill her!" Joker said happily. Headshaw repeatedly punched Batgirl in the stomach and she was trying to scream through her gag. "ARGGG!" Batman screamed and broke free from the chewing gum. Rocko smacked Batgirl hard across the face and threw her.

Batman punched Rocko in the stomach hard then kicked Headshaw in the neck. He grabbed Joker before he even knew what hit him. "I'LL KILL YOU RIGHT HERE!" Batman growled. "Hahahahaha! Batman! You would never kill me!" Joker said and punched him in the mouth. Harley kicked him in the face and Batman grabbed her ankle and tripped her. When Batman looked he saw Joker putting a revolver up to Batgirl's head. "You lose, Batman!" Joker said evilly. Batman threw a batorang and it knocked the gun away. He tackled the Joker and punched him without stopping. Batgirl got up and went to free Montoya. "NO!" Joker yelled and Batman gave him a finishing blow. He went flying into a huge stack of trash cans. "We did it!" Batman said. A police car pulled up and the officer called for backup.

The credits roll.


	11. Good bye old friend

Disclaimer: I do not own Batman.

The police were on the tail of Jazman's gang. They finally pulled their car over on a corner. "WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED!" Bullock yelled in a loud speaker. "Oh really? Time to sing to the beat of the dead!" Jazman yelled from inside the car and pulled out a tommygun. "Comish! We need to stop him! Pointy ears is late!" Bullock reminded. "Okay! Return fire!" Gordon ordered. "I have a bone to pick with you Gordon!" Jazman said and ran out of the car and into a building. Several of his henchmen got out and covered him. Gordon ran into the building after him with his revolver out of it's holster. "GIVE IT UP JAZMAN!" Gordon screamed into the empty old building. "Come on in Gordon the music is fine!" Jazman screamed from an unknown spot. Gordon looked up the stairs and Jazman ran into a room at the end of the hall. Batman surprised him and punched him across the room and into the wall. "Give it up Jazman!" Batman said seriously. "NOT BEFORE I GET GORDON!" Jazman yelled and fired his machine gun randomly around the room. The bullets went through the walls and bounced down the hall.

Batman punched Jazman in the face and he fell down to the ground. He went out into the hall and saw Bullock rushing up the stairs. "Bats is here!" Bullock yelled. Then he spotted a body on the wooden floor and blood was splattered all over the walls. "Oh my god..." Bullock said and his eyes went wide. "Jim...no!" Batman said shocked. An officer went to Gordon and checked his pulse. "We've lost him detective!" The officer said. "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! Put your hands where we can see them...murderer!" Bullock ordered and aimed his revolver at Batman. Jazman slid down the gutter pipe and disappeared out into the night. He left his machine gun into the room to frame Batman. Summer Gleason came on camera. "Last night in the west Gotham district James Gordon was assaulted and murdered by Batman while following the notorious Jazman. Batman will be on trial in two weeks." Summer said and then Alfred turned off the news. Dick and Barbra were sitting on the couch. Barbra was crying and hadn't eaten breakfast yet.

Dick was trying to cheer her up but it wasn't working. "I know Bruce couldn't have done it Barb...Jazman must be framing him!" Dick explained. "My word...it makes me feel so angry at Gotham to think Master Bruce would do such a thing!" Alfred said sternly. Batman was in a holding cell. Bullock opened the door and came in and walked to his cell. "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT POINTY EARS!" Bullock yelled and spit on Batman. "Harvey! I know what it looks like but I didn't kill Gordon!" Batman screamed. "Yeah right! I knew we shouldn't have trusted you. We should just let Joker out of Arkham and let him destroy Gotham. Then you'll see how much you just took from our city! I HOPE THEY LOCK YOU UP AND THROW AWAY THE KEY YOU FREAK!" Bullock yelled and left him. "Bruce!" Robin whispered from the window. "I'm busting you out of here!" Robin said and put a bomb on the window. Batman ducked down and then escaped with Robin.

"LATEST NEWS IS BATMAN ESCAPED WITH ROBIN! THE POLICE ARE ON A MAN HUNT TO GET THEM BOTH!" Summer Gleason said. Batman looked around the town fleaing cops at sight for weeks until he found Jazman's hideout. "You'll pay for framing me!" Batman screamed and threw Jazman against the wall. "I'LL TAKE YOU TO THE TOP OF THIS BUILDING AND DROP YOU!" Batman threatened. "No please! I'll admit everything to the police!" Jazman begged. "You better or so help me!" Batman threatened and hand cuffed Jazman.

THE END


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